Love thy neighbor as thyself

We were asked to speak in our ward a couple of weeks ago.  The topic was the post title, and I thought I'd share some my thoughts here.  I'm a firm believer that the topics we get are for us to study and ponder more in depth and it's something to work on.  

Matthew 22:36-39.  “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.  This is the first and great commandment.  And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”  Of all of the commandments, if the second and “great commandment” is to love our neighbors, how important is loving others?  The Savior always emphasized how we should treat others and he was the perfect example of how we should love others. 

President Uchdorf said: “Because love is the great commandment, it ought to be at the center of all and everything we do in our own family, in our Church callings, and in our livelihood. Love is the healing balm that repairs rifts in personal and family relationships. It is the bond that unites families, communities, and nations. Love is the power that initiates friendship, tolerance, civility, and respect. It is the source that overcomes divisiveness and hate. Love is the fire that warms our lives with unparalleled joy and divine hope. Love should be our walk and our talk.”

Now that we know we need to love our neighbors because it is a commandment, who exactly are our neighbors?  I think it means everyone!  For my purposes today, I’m going to divide “neighbor” up into four categories.  Our neighbors are our Family – Neighbors - Strangers - Enemies

First, Family – I believe love starts in the home and family and moves out from there. Home is a laboratory of love.  It is there we get the first taste of what love truly is and how to love others.  We learn how to love together. 

Sometimes we get so used to the people we live with, we might not treat them as kindly as we would others outside of the home, but we should treat them the best.  How guilty are we of becoming too casual in our relationships?  I know for me lately, sometimes I'll be using a not-so-kind tone of voice with my kids telling them not do this or that, and then the phone rings and I will answer in my sweetest voice "Hello?"  Being our best selves at home is one of our greatest goals.

Young men and young women (and the rest of us) there are some very wise words in the For the Strength of Youth booklet on how to love our families.  It says “Strong families require effort.  Your family will be blessed as you do your part to strengthen it.  Be cheerful, helpful, and considerate of family members.  Many problems in the home come from family members speaking and acting selfishly or unkindly.  Seek to be a peacemaker rather than to tease, fight, and quarrel.  Show love for your family members each day.  Share your testimony with your family through words and actions.  Your righteous example can make a difference in strengthening your family.  Honor your parents by showing love and respect for them.  Obey them as they lead you in righteousness.  Willingly help in your home.” 

On LDS.org, there is a special section right now all about love.  There are so many great articles, videos, and resources to study this topic in greater depth.   I love the song based on the scripture from John 13:34: “Love one another; as I have loved you.”  From the church website: “On this simple phrase hangs the success of every marriage and family. In the light of Christ’s love we see our family’s divine potential. We love them with all our heart, soul, and mind. And as we do, our ordinary family is transformed into an extraordinary one.”  Do we want an ordinary family or extraordinary one?

While Jesus was on the cross, though he was in such agony and pain, he was still thinking of and putting his family first.  Mary sat near the cross and He knew what sadness and heartache she was facing and how exhausted she must have been.  He then said to one of his disciple “Behold thy mother!”  Jesus had him taker her home.  What tender love the Savior truly showed to his family.  And there are so many unwritten stories I’m sure that occurred between Jesus and his mortal family. 

In my own life, I’ve been blessed to have always been surrounded by family who has loved me.  My parents loved and taught us growing up and still do, and my siblings have become my very best friends.  My husband and children are so loving towards their sometimes undeserving mother.  And they always make sure that I know I am loved, through notes or cards, a nice phone call or text, hugs and kisses, and telling me that they love me.  They have made all of the difference in my life and have helped me feel the love of our Heavenly Father and Savior through their love.  We have had our shares of ups and downs, but we continue to learn and love.  I love them so much and am grateful for them. 

Next, neighbors.  Our neighbors are all those with whom we associate – friends, those who live by us, co-workers, people at school.  In “My Gospel Standards” written for Primary children, it says “I will seek good friends and treat others kindly.”  We should all look for friends and surround ourselves with those with whom are uplifting to associate with.  We should be a friend to all, but make close friends with those who will encourage us to uphold our standards. 

Service is a huge part of loving others.  In the Teachings of Joseph Fielding Smith, he tells us “our service in the Church expresses love for others and appreciation for the Lord’s infinite service.”  In this month’s New Era magazine, Sister Carol F. McConkie of the Young Women General Presidency stated “Service is synonymous with keeping the commandments of God,” and it represents our love for the Lord.  The Savior taught, “if thou lovest me thou shalt serve me and keep all my commandments; thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy might, mind, and strength; and in the name of Jesus Christ thou shall serve him.”  At baptism we covenanted that we would serve God and keep his commandments.  As followers of Christ, we always strive to participate in His work, and that involves serving.”

I think also if we have a genuine love for others, teaching the Gospel and missionary work will come easy.  In “Teaching, No Greater Call” it states “If you have Christlike love, you will be better prepared to teach the gospel.  You will be inspired to help others know the Savior and follow Him.”

I believe the way we treat others shows how we feel about our Savior and Heavenly Father.  It is an outward expression of our inward love for Them. 

Christ was known for being a great friend.  With his disciples, probably some of his closest friends or neighbors, he cared for them by showing compassion.  One day, as they gathered, he washed the feet of his disciples, which was something someone lower in status would usually do.  They questioned him on why he was doing it, the Lord of all.  He taught them some great lessons on being clean and then told them “If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another’s feet.  For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you.”   He taught us how to be a friend.  

I have really had many neighbors I could count on and who made a difference in my life.  This is the type of neighbor and friend I want to be. When we lived in Spokane, though we were all so different in ages, race, religion, sexual preference, etc., we were all friends.  It was a race to shovel each other’s driveways, we had neighbors offer to help watch the kids, always dropping off treats or surprises for the kids, and enjoyed talking to each other out by the mailboxes in genuine concern and love for each other.  They were all great examples to me of how to be a friend. 

Strangers –  It is a little harder to love someone we don’t even know.  But we are commanded to love all, so strangers fall under that too. 

Mother Teresa, was a Roman Catholic nun made famous by humbly going about serving people for most of her 87 years in Calcutta, India.  She not only gave great us great words of wisdom, but showed us how to love others, just like the Savior did.  She loved the unlovable and untouchable, most of who she never knew.  She spent her life serving the Savior by serving others.  One of my favorite quotes of all time is from Mother Teresa.  I think it’s a great mantra for all of us.  “Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.”  We should leave people, all people, better than we found them. 

Jesus showed the same love to others, whether they were his friends or complete strangers.  When he was out teaching one day, some children and their parents approached him that he might bless them and pray.  But the disciples felt they were too busy and didn’t have time for others, who they probably didn’t know anyways and rebuked Jesus.  But Jesus took time for them and said “Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me.”  He was always taking time to befriend, comfort, heal, strengthen, help, lift and love strangers.

Once my family went on a road trip, which we did frequently.  We were headed to California and this is one of those times when it seemed everything went wrong.  My dad decided to take the scenic route, and we ended up out on a Native American reservation on a dirt road.  To make a long story short, two of our tires got shredded and one went flat, and we only had one spare.  So we were stuck out in the middle of no where and hadn't seen any cars for miles.  Being young, my siblings and I were all worried we were going to die, so we began planning rationing our snacks and water, and wrote S.O.S. in the sand with some rocks, hoping a helicopter would fly by and come rescue us.  We waited and worried, said some prayers, and a while later, an old VW bus came bumping down the road.  They stopped, thank goodness, and asked what they could do.  We all piled in their van, and they offered us water and a ride to the nearest town so we could have a tow truck go pick it up and get it fixed.  I'm sure they've long forgotten about this experience.  But for my siblings and I, their kind act of service will never be forgotten.  A little gesture can go a long way.  

Finally, and I believe the hardest, love thy enemies.  Some of the most well-known scriptures from the Savior’s Sermon on the Mount include this verse from Matthew 5.  “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”  I like what it says after that though.  “That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.”  He loves all of His children, no matter who they are or what they've done.  Shouldn't we too?  Then he asks us questions in relation to this.  “For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye?  Do not even the publicans the same.  And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others?  Do not even the publicans so?  Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven perfect. “ Loving our enemies is being perfect, like He is.  Loving our family, our friends, that’s easy.  But forgiving, and loving those who have wronged us is the true challenge. 

When the Savior was on the cross at Calvary, near death, he forgave all those who had abused, tormented, made fun of, offended in every way and who would kill him.  He said, “Father, forgive them.  They know not what they do.” I can't think of anything harder than that, but he freely forgave them.  

As an elementary school student, there was a girl and I that did not get along. For some reason, we just did not like each other.  I remember her telling me once that my headband was ugly and I was appalled.  At the end of the school year, i remember drawing a mustache on her picture in the yearbook.  We always went back and forth like this.  The next year at school, we both had a change of heart, forgave, and an enemy became a friend.  We became best friends and enjoyed many fun times together - playing at each other's houses, parties, sleepovers, and we played on the same sports teams.  My life became better from knowing her, and hopefully the same could be said of me.  

I would like to conclude with the words of our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson.  “My brothers and sisters, we are surrounded by those in need of our attention, our encouragement, our support, our comfort, our kindness – be they family members, friends, acquaintances, or strangers.  We are the Lord’s hands here upon the earth, with the mandate to serve and to lift His children.  He is dependent on each of us.  That service to which all of us have been called is the service of the Lord Jesus Christ.” 

Let us follow the example of our Savior and love our neighbors – our families, friends, strangers, and enemies – with all our heart, might, mind and strength as He did is my prayer.  I know the Savior Jesus Christ lives and has set the perfect example for us in all things.  I love Him and am so grateful for His love in my life.  It is everything.